Purpose of Tests:
To determine specific weaknesses and/or strengths possessed by
In order to determine said weaknesses and strengths, many
Volunteer Bunnies and Control Bunnies risked their lives to take part
in several tests. The tests were usually painful, yet not always
cruel. They were as follows...
Slow Application of
Apparently, the Yellow Bunnies are the more suicidal/brave of the
species, with the pink ones a close second. Lavender Bunnies seemed
to be content to lie in their natural state (lying side by side
attached to their neighbors by the torso and ears) when volunteers
were asked to come forward. Regardless of the color of their "skin"
however, all Bunnies managed to perform their specified tests to the
Marshmallow Bunnies are fairly brave, intelligent creatures (even
when it comes to volunteering for dangerous experiments) that
survived the tests with varying degrees of success.
Traitor Bunny: This is the Bunny
responsible for selling out his/her own kind... it would appear that
he/she was supplying the researchers with information regarding Bunny
customs and hiding places, which enabled the researchers to "recruit"
the "Volunteer" Bunnies. This may explain the slight minority of
Lavender Bunnies coming forward and the eventual slight uneasiness
around Lavender Bunnies by the Yellows and Pinks... Traitor Bunny may
have been a Racist Bunny who warned his "own kind" about the
experiments, and what they would entail. Unfortunately, this
information died with Traitor Bunny when what was left of the Volunteer Bunnies
Bunnies and the Control Bunnies got to him. The researchers tried to
intervene, but it was far too late. On the plus side, the remaining bunnies were able to perform the Bunny Death
Ritual for Traitor Bunny after they lynched him.
Q:Can I suggest a Bunny Survival Test?
A:You can suggest whatever you hoppy well please. But if I get another ÒVacuum Chamber TestÓ suggestion, I¼m going to throw my mouse out the window. I¼m sure it will land on a Volunteer Bunny and I can write it up. I promise, you will never see a Subject Bunny in a bell jar!
Q:Do Bunnies bite?
A:Marshmallow Bunnies have no mouths... Much less teeth... This is
probably a good thing since nobody would want to chip their teeth
when devouring Marshmallow Bunnies.
Q:Are there any more Tests???
A:YES! A sequel site is now UP AND RUNNING! The Bunnies Strike Back!(updated 4-5-99)
Q:These Bunny Survival Tests seem needlessly cruel and painful for
the Subject Bunnies. Have there been any problems with animal rights
A:Not yet. However this could change, as the email comes pouring
in with threats of calling PETA and the ASPCA.
Q:How many people have written death threats or offered the
opinion that you are a SICK SICK SICK individual?
A:I am not getting much email about these pages anymore..
Q:Are any Peeps (the Marshmallow Chicks) tests planned?
A: Let's just say that Peeps are vile, evil little creatures and cannot be trusted
to accurately report sensations of pain/suffering during testing...
Only the Bunnies can be 100% honest while taking part in the tests.
Peeps also do not seem to have the attention span necessary. So we will see no "tests" per se, but perhaps
something totally different...
E-Mail: bunnies@keypad(add a .org to
This is copyrighted material, and may not be reproduced in any way without the written permission of the author. ©1998-2003, Mark
Smith,(add a .org to email)
I get several requests a day from people wanting to link to my site. The answer is, Yes, you are more than welcome to link to this page at http://www.keypad.org/bunnies
Just Born Inc. produce Peeps, Marshmallow Bunnies, and many other
products and obviously own all the rights to said critters. Go buy
some... You know you want some...